Suing In America... OY!

BEST LAWYER STORY OF THE YEAR, DECADE AND PROBABLY THE CENTURY.

A lawyer purchased a box of very rare and expensive cigars, then insured

them against, among other things, fire.

Within a month, having smoked his entire stockpile of these great cigars

and without yet having made even his first premium payment on the policy

the lawyer filed a claim against the insurance company...

In his claim, the lawyer stated the cigars were lost 'in a series of small fires.'

The insurance company refused to pay, citing the obvious reason, that

the man had consumed the cigars in the normal fashion.



The lawyer sued and WON!



(Stay with me.)


Delivering the ruling, the judge agreed with the insurance company that

the claim was frivolous. The judge stated nevertheless, that the lawyer

held a policy from the company, which it had warranted that the cigars

were insurable and also guaranteed that it would insure them against

fire, without defining what is considered to be unacceptable 'fire' and was

obligated to pay the claim.

Rather than endure lengthy and costly appeal process, the insurance

company accepted the ruling and paid $15,000 to the lawyer for his

loss of the cigars lost in the 'fires'.


NOW FOR THE BEST PART...

After the lawyer cashed the check, the insurance company had him

arrested on 24 counts of ARSON!!!

With his own insurance claim and testimony from the previous case being

used against him, the lawyer was convicted of intentionally burning his

insured property and was sentenced to 24 months in jail and a $24,000 fine.

Why Ad Agencies Require Contingency Plans

As I was perusing this months issue of Cosmopolitan - a magazine I never read for this reason- I came across this lively little ad.
With an eye catching summer-ish apple green background and multi-coloured bubble letters in tangerine, this ad obviously is intended for a target group of 16-25's. Some critics suggest it is marketed for 18-24's, however we need to keep in mind the audience for Cosmo mags. Anyone who reached the age of 20 has long since given up on this magazine due to its repetitive and useless articles, not to mention commodification of women and sex - but THAT'S another post.
This has got to be one of THE most irresponsible advertisements I've seen marketed to the youth age group. Plan B?! How did this become so common? Got a hangover? Take an Advil. Got unprotected sex woes? Take Plan B! I'm so very concerned about the attention that is paid to after-sex damage control. Whatever happened to safer sex?
Putting aside the "pro-life" - "pro-choice" debates that surround the very availability of this product, let's examine realistically the incredibly flawed campaign principles. In a society enjoying an alarming increase in HIV/AIDS and other STD's, especially in the age group of 18-24's, how is it that we are now making available an "oops" post-coital anti-pregnancy drug?
Further - when did that become COOL?? Right here on this advertisement is a website: calling you to share your oops story. Not only is it cool that you can undo the oops we didn't have a condom deal, but now why don't we post these stories on a website, providing a false sense of security to those teens who read them. The last thing this society needs is to encourage reckless sexual behaviour.
Before I get any indignant comments, let me just add that I understand the necessity for some people to take advantage of this product. I understand the theories surrounding date rape, molestation and true accidental condom breaks. I understand that these products can definitely help people who truly need it. My problem lies with the advertising campaigns that try to make the morning after pill seem as innocuous as an aspirin or antacid. We should be spending more money education these young women about the FATAL side effects of unprotected sex, the by-products other than reproduction. In my opinion there are greater risks for a demographic motto of play-now/pill-later, other than a new generation of squealing infants. We in fact have a responsibility to the youth of today, to inform and prevent the spread of these horrific diseases over which they do have some control!
It is naive to push for abstinence. I understand that. What you don't know CAN hurt you, but in this instance, what you do know can too. Steer the youth of today away from a false sense of security after reading the share your oops. Teach them how to avoid them altogether.

Nobody Puts Baby in the Glass: How Bonsai Kitty Reveals our Penchant for Oppressive Female Trends

At first glance, Bonsai Kitty appears to cater to the recent obsession with miniature pets. In a society loaded with purse puppies, plastic surgery and the ever-prevalent celebrity culture, Bonsai Kitten affords a unique answer for cat lovers. This site offers several options for these personalized felines, ranging from do-it-yourself kits to sending your own kitten for customized body modification. Those interested in acquiring their very own custom kitty may view the gallery photos or peruse the sales section offering various custom shaping vessels and paraphernalia. At closer scrutiny however, this site is clearly answering to a darker problem. Bonsai Kitten is a scathing critique of materialistic trends: purse pets that are worn as trendy status symbols for celebrity culture, and the ever-growing plastic surgery industry. More importantly, this site exposes how these trends oppress the women who seek them.
The introductory page for Bonsai Kitty contains two short paragraphs outlining the purpose of kitten body modification and the central principles behind this unique process. Simple black and white colour schemes make this introduction visually boring; the only images provided are two identical photographs of a “contained kitty”. The first line, boasting, “for centuries, people in the West have marveled at the delicate beauty produced by Oriental artists and sculptors” (Bonsai, Intro) is immediately suspect. One can easily reason that yes, there is beauty to be found in the art of bonsai trees, however can that extend to a desire to form living kittens into twisted art? The generalized explanative text does little to convince the reader of the legitimatacy of this site, offering stereotypical views of a vague Western obsession with Orientalism “for centuries” (Bonsai, Intro). Further text couples this vague reference with practices such as foot or head binding, glibly thrown in as another art form to appreciate. As a sign of oppression, especially for women, this site slips off the believability scale in a hurry, rushing towards feminist defense at the speed of light. Despite its sarcastic undertones aimed at society’s obsession with both customized items and accessory pets, there is a kernel of intrigue present.
Traveling to the “Methods” tab generally produces the same type of ridiculous text. This site is obvious in its sarcastic and very dark humor, emphasizing the importance of “Super Glue” in controlling waste removal: “It’s just like a kitty colostomy bag!” (Bonsai, Methods). Again, there are comments within the description claiming to provide what “you’ve always wanted . . . in the shape you’ve always dreamed of!” (Bonsai, Methods), a point made by Lorrie Blair and Maya Shalmon in their essay, Cosmetic Surgery and the Cultural Construction of Beauty. These additions point to the underlying critique of materialism in current society, extending from personal body modification to plastic surgery, images that are “embedded in our culture and transmitted from early childhood . . . reinforc[ing] the notion that beauty is a prerequisite for happiness” (Blair and Shalmon, 2005) . As this website playfully modifies kittens, the subverted message becomes clear: obsession with image and celebrity defies all rationality. If you will wear your dog as part of your purse, why not mold your kitten into one? As Blair and Shalmon argue, these “advertisements carry the suggestion that cosmetic surgery will . . . improve one’s quality of life” (Blair and Shalmon, 2005). Bonsai Kitten is clear in its exasperation with these obsessions, its sarcastic undertones revealing the empty logic behind superficial modification. This site works not to perpetuate the distorted visions of plastic surgery as self-worth, but rather to point out their absurdities.
The photo gallery itself houses only two links, each providing a few images of insertion and kitten containment. Although the site itself has done an admirable job in poking clean fun, these images are enough to engender animal activist fervor. Images of kittens stuffed inside jars, with flat faces and cramped extremities are inhumane, even for the few minutes it takes to snap the photo. As the only real images of this feigned “process”, it fails to show the results of bonsai containment, despite how much we want, or do not want, to view them. More importantly, these images work to anticipate post-surgical realities, de-bunking cultural images of model-esque post-op beauties, seemingly without worry or care. Real post-operative images are hidden from our visual society precisely because they are just as disturbing as these contained kittens. In conjunction with these images, this site is topped off with a realistic sales page that offers visual images of do-it-yourself tools. By making available custom modification containers as well as the ever-important Super Glue, this site is complete in its attempt to cater to trendy obsessions.
Generally speaking, the site in and of itself is successful. Although it can never, or should never, actually sell modification practices for the common house cat, it borders on the ridiculous, pointing to the same ridiculousness its creator applies to materialistic trends. Kitten images aside, it successfully critiques the practices of both body modification and accessory pets as trends without logic, identifying the recent need to conform to celebrity culture to the best of our abilities. Those oppressive references to foot and head binding in the intro capture women in the crosshairs, similarly caught in the obsessive trendsetter fast lane. As this website suggests, it is both without logic, and misleading. Conformity never leads to originality, and with as much disgust as we view these images of contained kittens, should we view those trendy illogics in pop culture.
This message certainly comes at a time when plastic surgery is on the rise, a time when modification has been accepted as a legitimate answer to societies distorted versions of beauty. Culture today has become so obsessed with visual modification that Dr. Michael Slazhauer has released a children’s book about plastic surgery, designed to explain to young children procedures such as breast augmentation and tummy tucks (Parzen, 2008). What possibly could be gained in creating propaganda such as this? These items further enforce unrealistic standards for beauty, teaching our children at younger ages to perpetuate this distorted vision. It seems that despite the claim to individuality that body modification trends present, one always ends up crammed into the glass, looking out at the world with the coveted “bonsai kitty expression” (Bonsai, Gallery), all the while claiming to enjoy the originality we “have always dreamed of” (Bonsai, Intro).

Works Cited
Blair Lorrie, and Shalmon, Maya. “Cosmetic Surgery and the Cultural Construction of
Beauty”. RedOrbit. May. 2005. Accessed 15 July 2008.
http://www.redorbit.com/news/health/148585/cosmetic_surgery_and_the_cultural_construction_of_beauty/
Bonsai Kitten. Accessed 15 July 2008.
http://www.shorty.com/bonsaikitten/index.html
Parzen, Molly C. “Plastic Surgery Sending the Wrong Message. 2008”. The Bi-College
News Online. July. 2008. Accessed 21 July 2008. http:www.biconews.com/?p=7151

Welcome

Welcome to my culture comment page. I plan to use this site to fully examine anything I deem note worthy in today's pop culture!